Happy National Sibling Day

As the youngest of four I was always getting teased, taunted and told what to do. Somehow as they years went by the roles shifted. Although the personality traits noted by the birth order theorist Alfred Adler don’t mirror my siblings there are some similarities.

The birth order theory began in the late 1920s with Alfred Adler, Sigmund Freud’s friend and colleague. Adler believed that the order in which you are born into a family inherently affects your personality.

The first-born (oldest) child. According to Adler, the oldest child tends to be conservative, power-oriented, and predisposed toward leadership. Because they often take responsibility for their younger siblings, firstborns grow up to be caring, more willing to become parents, and more likely to take initiative.




General traits of the oldest include;

  • Reliable
  • Conscientious
  • Structured
  • Cautious
  • Controlling
  • Over Achievers

The second (middle) child. Since the older brother or sister is a “pace-setter” for the second child, they often struggle to surpass their older sibling. The pace of development is higher. The middle kids in a family often tend to be ambitious, but they are rarely selfish. They are also more likely to set unreasonably high goals for themselves. This increases the number of failures, however knowing how to cope with difficulties in life is what makes them stronger.

Middle children tend to possess the following characteristics;

  • People-pleasers
  • Somewhat Rebellious
  • Peacemakers
  • Wider Social Circle
  • Thrives on friendships

The last-born (youngest) child. As a rule, the youngest child gets a lot of care and attention from parents and even older siblings. That is why they may feel less experienced and independent. However, last-borns are usually highly motivated to surpass their older sisters and brothers. Very often they achieve a big success and earn recognition in their chosen field. They become the fastest athletes, the best musicians, or the most talented artists. The youngest children in a family tend to be very sociable, though they are likely to be more irresponsible and frivolous than older children. Youngest children tend to be the most free-spirited due to their parents’ increasingly laissez-faire attitude towards parenting the second (or third, or fourth, or fifth…) time around.

The baby of the family tends to be;

  • Fun-loving
  • Manipulative
  • Outgoing
  • Attention Seeking
  • Uncomplicated

I would say most of the above does fit my personality. There is another category worth noting for exceptions when age gaps within families exist. In our case, 10-12 years between my older sibling and I, they call these Gap Children.

Gap Children: They consider at least five years in between births a substantial gap in the birth order structure. A 2-year-old boy with an 8-year-old older sister isn’t going adopt middle-child traits, but rather those of a firstborn. This gap can lead to perfectionist traits more like an only child.

The adjectives don’t always fit the personality but it is fun to take a look at what it means to be one of many in a birth order on this April 10th, Sibling Day. As the quote says, we all know blood is thicker than water. We readily pick on each other but heaven help the outsider who comes between you and your sibling.


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Take Charge Of Your Time

Time is the great equalizer we all have 60 minutes an hour, 24 hours each day, 168 hours each week, 8,736 hours each year. Do you ever wonder how some people seem so efficient with the use of their time while you are always running late, and chasing your time?

Prioritize

Here’s their secret: busy people make time, for the activities they decide are important. They also know where they spend their time. So ask yourself, “Where do I lose time?” When you find the answers to that question you will be on the path to saving precious time. It happens to me almost every night. I tell my husband, I am going upstairs to the office for an hour to pay some bills and do a few things. Three hours later from beneath the staircase a voice calls up, “Are you coming down anytime tonight?” Somehow time has a way of running away from me.  

Schedule

Enter my new best friend, the stopwatch. The stopwatch was invented by Samuel Watson in 1659. It was originally used for horse races. I was feeling a bit like a race horse shot out of the gate at full speed only to endlessly circle the track for hours with no real sense of accomplishment always missing the winners circle time and again. The modern day stopwatch, which can be found on all smart phones, has become my Robin Hood. Stealing precious intervals of time back for me to use more efficiently or put in my bank providing a well-defined starting and finishing line. One of my goals this year was to find more time to write, blog and use my creative juices. The stopwatch can help recapture time. It speaks directly to you, a private reminder that your time is up. Allowing you to track and block time more efficiently.

Execute

Time management takes discipline but poor time management can take a toll and result in fatigue, moodiness and illness. Part of execution means you chart your time and track your progress by setting deadlines and keeping them. Be sure take time to recognize that you have accomplished a major task or challenge before moving on to the next activity. Ask yourself a few questions: Do you have a healthy work, life balance? Are you accomplishing the priorities that are most important in your life? Are you investing enough time in your own personal wellbeing? If the answer is “no” to any of these questions, then reconsider your time management strategies and set your stopwatch for one hour and determine how you can make better use of your time and what would result in deeper more meaning fulfillment.


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Foodies Converge At This Year’s FRLA-Palm Beach EATS

  

2018EATSlogoIn caflightimagese you missed it, this just happened- 12 local restaurants and farms came together to create a culinary showcase all in support of education for the next generation of hospitality and culinary students in Palm Beach County. What does EATS stand for? (Education, Agriculture, Together, Showcase)  0E5A4966

Some of the best restaurants in Palm Beach came out to create and support the Florida Restaurant & Lodging Association at the EATS event hosted under the stars at the West Palm Beach Hilton. Chef’s from The Regional, Eau Palm Beach, Harvest Seasonal Grill, The Blend Bistro, Echo at the Breakers and more joined forces to create mini-masterpieces with fresh produce from local farmers.

Cafe Chardonnay paired with Kai Kai Farms to create a Crab Crusted Golden Tilefish with a Vegetable Ragout of Spring Onions, Kale, Yellow Beans, Happy Rich Broccoli and Black Eyed Peas. Okeechobee Steakhouse was alongside Localecopia Marketplace & Monterey Mushrooms with a delicious Grilled Sirloin of Beef, Three Potato Cake and Mixed Mushroom Medley Braised in Cognac.0E5A4820

Pistache French Bistro worked with Spivey Farms/ Roe & Sons to create a Slow Orange & Almond Cake with a Local Berry Compote. Fruit compote

 Over 200 hospitality industry professionals, friends, teachers, students and foodies converged on Friday night in the open air lawn of the West Palm Beach Hilton to enjoy great food, fun and some amazing auction prizes.

The ProStart and HTMP students from Palm Beach area high schools participated by serving, hosting and welcoming guests. FAU professors, students and alumni also took part in the fun by working various stations, assisting with photography and the auction. Florida’s top two industries are Tourism and Agriculture. This powerful collaboration has unlimited potential to grow into a signature event for Palm Beach County. Florida has 112 million visitors a year and in 2016 they spent $111 billion in our state. The Agriculture industry employees over 2 million people and contributes $104 billion to the state’s economy. Look for a bigger and better EATS event next year. We hope to see you there! 

Student Chefs ProStart

Student Chefs ProStart

 

 

 

 

 


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South Florida Biz Journal Q&A: Jodi Cross on the best trip she’s ever taken

This week’s executive profile. 10.20.17

Jodi Cross

BirtBIZIMAGEhplace: Rochester, New York

Residence: Jupiter

Current position: Regional director, Palm Beach County, Florida Restaurant & Lodging Association

Previous positions: Founder, Cross Network Marketing Inc.; corporate director of marketing, Sonesta Hotels, Resorts & Cruises; executive director, The Commonwealth Institute South Florida; director of marketing, Trump International Sonesta Beach Resort; director of marketing, Doral Golf Resort and Spa; VP, The Neighborhood Marketing Institute; director of marketing, PGA National Resort & Spa

Education: M.B.A, Nova Southeastern University; B.A. in hotel hospitality management, St. Thomas University

 The travel bug bit Jodi Cross at 10 years old. 

That’s when a family trip to Hawaii “turned her life upside down,” said Cross, regional director for the Palm Beach County chapter of the Florida Restaurant & Lodging Association. At that young age, she realized there was a whole world out there to discover and many more places she wanted to see.

Today, Cross is an avid traveler, equestrian, golfer and hospitality marketing professional with over 20 years in the business working with brands whose properties span the globe. But the place she likes to work more than anywhere in the world is at home.

Cross talked to the Business Journal about her first job, a recent trip that stood out and technology she can’t live without.

Can you talk about one of the best trips you’ve ever taken? Two years ago, my husband and I went to Paris, where his father was shot down in World War II. While we were there, we found the person who headed up the historical registry of pilots shot down during the war. He happened to know the owners of the farm where he crashed. When we got there, we met this old woman who remembered the day it happened. Then her son comes out with this crate and asks us, “Would you like to take a piece of your father’s plane with you?” It was just amazing. Here is a piece WPBF ran about our trip when we returned. https://youtu.be/IIVGq9ZlQHo 

How did you get into horseback riding? When I grew up in Rochester, I started riding horses and it became a passion of mine. I’ve been riding ever since. We make it part of our trips, like when last year I went to North Carolina, I rode three or four times. We went down to Puerto Rico recently and had a riding experience there. I used to ride often at Wandering Trails in Palm Beach Gardens.

Where will your next trip be? I just booked a cruise and we’re going to Quebec, Montreal and Halifax in Canada.

What was your first job in hospitality? I started out as a sales manager with Interstate Hotels at the former Sheraton Brickell Point. My boss was an ex-nun and she used to work all night long. Meeting her probably would have sent someone running out of that career immediately, but she really taught me a lot about my craft and the relentless pursuit of excellence.

What’s the best piece of advice you received? When I was the executive director at The Commonwealth Institute of South Florida, the founder, Lois Silverman, had some interesting advice. She told me: Think about the answer you want before you ask the question. I took that to heart.

What makes a good leader? A lot of times, as a leader, you have to step back from working on your business. You have to go from working in your business, to working on your business. A lot of people are putting out fires every day and don’t take the time to think about strategy. I take some quiet time in the morning and think, “What are the two things that we’re going to accomplish today that move revenue forward?” You get into your busy day and lose sight of that strategy sometimes. My to-do list never ends.

If you could work anywhere in the world, where would it be? I really like to work from home. With today’s portable office situation, you can pretty much work anywhere. I love having that flexible work environment, where you can be anywhere and still be productive.

What are the positives of doing business in South Florida? The negatives? The diversity is a plus. It’s a real melting pot down here. You have so many people who have relocated down here from around the world, and they have a ton of talents. As for the negatives, I find that some people don’t have the same work ethic and values down here as they do in the Northeast and Midwest.

What’s an app you can’t live without? I just love Uber. I use it all the time.

Emon Reiser

Digital Producer

South Florida Business Journal

https://www.bizjournals.com/southflorida/news/2017/10/17/executive-profile-jodi-cross.html


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Mad in America

Mad in America

CoffeeIf we are going to make America great again shouldn’t we figure out what is making us so angry? What is really behind all this anger in America?  When you ask people it varies a great deal by demographic, age and political party. For the last 8 years, Republicans were angry about Obama, now Democrats are angry with Trump. Politics aside, everyone seems angry about government overreach, greed, school shootings, terrorism in America and unfair practices which put hard working Americans at a disadvantage. The problem with all this anger is no one is willing to listen to one another without a shouting match.

When you unpack the emotional side of anger you realize it’s just a mask. Anger is a way of dealing with a situation without addressing the feelings behind the emotion. Anger covers up fear, jealousy, frustration and feelings of powerlessness from a given situation. Angry people tend to be poor communicators and worse listeners.

One of the key storylines of our political culture has been the American Dream — the sense that if you work hard, you will get ahead. I know a lot of people who have worked hard their entire life, myself included. If I ask my husband what angers him, it is the notion that he has played by the rules, paying taxes and giving back while others don’t play by the same rules. Deep down we feel a sense of struggle for trying to live out our own personal version of the American dream. 

When you do a google search you can find angry people in all categories. There are the obvious results, “activists outraged,” or “angry conservatives”. But you may be surprised to find “angry vegans,” who are upset over the owners of a chain of plant-based restaurants who have taken to eating meat—on their own farm and their own time. There is a group blaming coffee called “caffeine rage,” where people are angry about coffee, both not having enough and having too much. And here is a strange one, “Angry Knitters” (something about the U.S. Olympic Committee not letting them use the term “knitters’ Olympics,” but people with large needles that can poke your eyes out should be paid attention to.) If we are looking for a culprit, maybe Starbucks is to blame for providing too much access to caffeine.

As we turn the page on a tumultuous year, let’s all try to unite for a common cause, America the great and powerful nation we call home. I have always found by showing people courtesy, respect and dignity you open the channels of communication. We need open channels if we are going to get things accomplished. There is a quote from Martin Luther King which summarizes our conundrum in a positive way. We are all individuals and we can live, work and play in harmony through respect. “If I wish to compose or write or pray or preach well, I must be angry,” Martin Luther King once said. “Then all the blood in my veins is stirred, and my understanding is sharpened.”

Let us be stirred in a positive way and our senses be sharpened for the common good of all.

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, speaker and freelance writer and blogger. She may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.crossnm.com .


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Goal Keeper Tim Howard was featured on the CBS Series Note to Self where he wrote about his personal journey and the things he learned along the way.  Tim mentioned the different roles self-belief and self-confidence played in his life. Many people use self-esteem and self-confidence interchangeably but they are quite different. Self-confidence can depend […]

What Matters Most is How you See Yourself

Goal Keeper Tim Howard was featured on the CBS Series Note to Self where he wrote about his personal journey and the things he learned along the way.  Tim mentioned the different roles self-belief and self-confidence played in his life. Many people use self-esteem and self-confidence interchangeably but they are quite different. Self-confidence can depend on performance, whereas self-belief comes from a nurturing place inside you which encourages and keeps you striving for greatness.

Self-esteem refers to how you feel about yourself overall and how much positive self-love you have. Your esteem develops from experiences and situations which have shaped how you view yourself in the world. Self-confidence is how you feel about your abilities and can vary from situation to situation. I may have healthy self-esteem, but low confidence about situations involving my math skills (this is true).

When you hold yourself in high regard, your belief in yourself improves, which makes you more confident. When you are confident in areas of your life, you begin to increase your overall sense of worth. There were many lessons I learned in my twenties which have shaped me today and strengthened my self-belief. These lessons, although painful at times, proved critical for developing coping skills later in life.

Your self-esteem can wane when you start to compare yourself with others. You feel great until you sit next to a super model then a critical spirit takes hold and you spiral into self-doubt. Embracing your authentic self means you trust yourself. The difference between our belief and confidence hinges on how much faith we have in ourselves and our abilities.

It makes sense that if we have a realistic internal rating of ourselves and see ourselves as equally competent, intelligent and attractive as others, we will feel confident in what we can do as well. However, there are times when we lack confidence and our ego takes hold to cover up a short coming. We have all heard the saying, “Fake it until you make it”. I have had to deploy this tactic before.  In my experience, you should always circle back and shore up the short coming so it doesn’t come back to bite you later on.

Inside each one of us resides a little voice, a spark of belief, who knows what we are capable of and has faith in our abilities. We just need to ignite the spark and let it shine! I like what Tim said, “Never lose the underlying belief in yourself”. Anything is possible if we have faith and believe in ourselves!

Jodi Cross is a marketing consultant, speaker and freelance writer and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.crossnm.com .

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What Are You Setting Your Sights On This Year

Goalimage

“My philosophy of life is that if we make up our mind what we are going to make of our lives, then work hard toward that goal, we never lose – somehow we always win out.” ~ Ronald Reagan

Happy New Year! We are all wondering what 2017 will bring. There has been a lot of talk about winning of late. As I reflect on 2016, I feel the need for a reboot. Generally each year I set goals for myself and check in around the mid-year mark to see if I have made any progress. Somewhere during the past year I lost my way.

Recently, I came across a new technique to establish some benchmarks. The format allows for reflection, action, accountability and my favorite part, celebration. I invite you to join me in this simple eight step process of setting your sights higher and vigorously taking action to accomplish your professional best in 2017.

Step 1-Reflect back on 2016 and ask yourself four questions.

  1. What have you enjoyed most?
  2. What have you been able to make a difference in? (This is a tough one as it relates to how you address your purpose in life)
  3. What were you most surprised by?
  4. What did you not feel prepared for?

Step 2-Determine what goals you accomplished in the past year and jot down how you celebrated the accomplishment. The celebration part is noteworthy, many times we work hard only to move on to the next thing without stopping to take an account of what we accomplished. Life is about savoring the sweetness of those special moments with friends and family.

Now you are ready to move on to 2017.

Step 3-What is important to you at the present moment? Think about 2017 priorities as everything is constantly shifting and changing in life.

Step 4-Detail out the things you want to: preserve, change or strive for in the coming year.

Step 5-Outline specific goals in the following areas. (These areas are subject to your interpretation and can be substituted for other priorities if you feel there is something more pressing on your agenda)

  1. Process Improvements
  2. Technology
  3. Growth or new business development
  4. Organizational aptitude or improvements
  5. Personal Development

Step 6-Once you determined your key areas of focus. Narrow down the list to the top three goals for 2017. 

Step 7-Determine how will you measure success and celebrate your accomplishments?

Step 8-How will you hold yourself accountable to do what you say you will do? What will the consequences be if you don’t take action?

Let’s see what we can all accomplish in the coming year. Wishing you much success.  

Jodi Cross is a marketing consultant, speaker and freelance writer and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.crossnm.com .

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Choose Happiness This Holiday Season

Happy Holiday


Choose Happiness This Holiday Season

This year has been a tumultuous year for our country. There have been upsets in elections, hurricanes and protests. As we head into the holiday season, I hope we can all turn a page on the things we don’t have in common and focus on being happy. So many people DREAD the holidays! There are many reasons such as; extra work, shopping, cooking, entertaining, family obligations and let’s not forget strife. Family strife comes in all shapes and sizes just like the ghosts of Christmas’s past and it can rob you of a happy and joyous holiday season.

This year let’s set aside the strife and focus on harmony, happiness and being kinder to one another. The holiday’s are about family, friendship and spending time together. If you’re travelling this year, bring your patience and try smiling at the people you meet. By keeping a positive attitude you can elevate stress and make someone else’s day.

Positivity outweighs negativity five to one, conversely negativity sucks the life out of relationships. Lucky for us we get to choose our attitude. Here are some other notable stress buster to keep you in your happy place;

  • Keep an exercise routine, don’t overeat, and plan ahead. I love to go for a nice walk on Christmas morning once the turkey’s in and cooking. Remember that just because there is a huge meal on the table there is no need to overindulge.
  • If shopping fills you with anxiety try drawing names or giving everyone gift cards. People really like to buy their own gifts anyway.
  • If baking or extra cooking puts you in a bad mood, try a cookie exchange or catering a meal. Last year, I made two-three dozen cookies and I ended up with 6-7 different types with an exchange group.

Let happiness rule your holiday season, trust me it will be contagious. May Peace and Harmony be with you this season and in the New Year!

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, writer and blogger. She can be reached at jcross@crossnm.com.

 

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Give Thanks & Honor to a Veteran This Month

Military Shields

November 11th is Veterans Day, a day when Americans celebrate the brave men and women who have served in our nation’s armed forces. Yet, for many of us, the day passes with little thought or opportunity to honor our veterans.  For many veterans, the most powerful thanks you can give is to simply understand why they served and what this nation stands for because of their service.  

It’s easy to think we know what being in the military is like. My grandson just joined the Army and we couldn’t be prouder of him. My husband served in the Navy and my niece and nephew are both in the Army. We see movies about instilling discipline and teamwork, following orders and being tough. The news shows us all the scary stuff: land mines, gun battles and enemy combatants lurking around every corner. Our soldiers train for those situations. However, sometimes the toughest parts aren’t the life-threatening predicaments, they are the absent from life moments they miss the most. Birthday parties, graduations, baby’s births, illness and so much more. Serving in the military comes with its own set of challenges for both the veteran and their families. Sometimes, those that served us so honorably and made sacrifices, feel abandoned, misunderstood or ignored.

A recent study conducted on behalf of the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs looked into suicides of military veterans. In 2014, an average of 22 veterans die from suicide each day. Six out of 20 were users of Veterans Administration services. Veterans accounted for 18 percent of all deaths from suicide among U.S. adults while veterans constituted 8.5 percent of the U.S. population. In addition, there are over 67,000 homeless veterans in the US today.

So what can you do to honor and thank a Veteran this year? Start by showing some appreciation. Fly your flag. Visit a VA Hospital or veteran’s cemetery and decorate a grave. There are many public events and parades for honoring our service men and women. Look for charities to donate to veteran’s causes.

You may have seen the recent #22pushups campaign on social media. This stems from the #22KILL movement started in 2013 after the VA released the staggering statistic that an average of 22 veterans are killed by suicide every day. 22KILL has committed to researching and understanding the genesis of this epidemic, and educating the general public on the issues of suicide and mental health issues that can lead to suicide. These issues can stem from Post-Traumatic Stress, Traumatic Brain Injury, or the struggles and stresses of transitioning from military to civilian life.

If you can’t afford to make a donation at this time you can go to amillionthanks.org and send a letter of appreciation to a veteran. This non-profit doesn’t cost you anything but your time.

American’s Veterans have done everything asked of them in their mission to serve our country and it is never too late to give them a hero’s welcome home. I hope you’ll consider showing your appreciation to all of those who have served and are serving our country, no matter how you do it. I like to re-read In Flanders’ Fields which always provides a poignant reminder of our soldier’s brave sacrifices.

Happy Veterans Day!

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CT Takes Off -Destination Key Largo

Keys4     Key Largo’s Newest Hotel

It’s just a Flip Flop Away From Miami

Where to Stay

Discover Playa Largo, Key Largo’s newest destination resort perched on the Bay in the Florida Keys. We recently made an impromptu getaway and our GPS was set on Key Largo’s newest resort, Playa Largo. This mini-sanctuary is just a short jog from the mainland but you feel like you’ve left the hustle and bustle behind; the local’s call it Key’s Time. The resort offers a unique vantage point from the lobby with a glimpse of the pool and bay beckoning you in.  Ah, a deep breath and a rush of relaxation flowed over us as we are met with warm hospitality and a resort associate who remotely checks us in with iPads. Libations are offered as we assess our surroundings. Keys6

Playa Largo was once a pineapple plantation and the resort gives a nod to its history with fresh pineapple water in the lobby and bright colors throughout. If you feel the need for some pampering, Ocean Spa offers a citrus twist on services and the therapists couldn’t be more welcoming. The lobby has a swanky feel with a Ceviche Bar, hanging swings and blown glass fixtures, dangling about catching the suns rays.

Playa Largo Pool

Playa Largo Pool

We decided to head to the pool and enjoy a frozen drink and some light cuisine. The pool is a playground for guests in need of relaxation. There are numbers of cabanas and beach side hammocks to help you fully relax, Keys’ style. This Florida paradise atop a vibrant archipelago awakens your senses to become present in the moment. As we sway carelessly in the hammock overlooking the bay we spot jumping fish. The sky turns orange then a deep red as natures masterpiece unfolds before our eyes and we realize why we’ve come to this serene spot in Florida.

Where to Play

Keys7While in Keys, immerse yourself in the local culture, in particular the underwater playground is not to be missed. The Florida Keys offers world-class snorkeling, diving, deep sea fishing and many other water sports all set upon a canopy of a sapphire blue water. Exploring in John Pennekamp State Park reveals the iconic underwater Christ Statue, an awe inspiring moment to be remembered along with more than 23 other man made and artificial reefs. If you feel lazy, which does happen in the Keys, you can opt to just lounge about in a hammock or hang out in a pool cabana. Key Largo is the longest key with 30 + miles to explore. You’ll find kitschy T-shirt shops and restaurants serving all varieties of fresh seafood, along with Artisan Villages selling local bounty.

There is so much more than just T-shirt shops and key lime pie stands. Playa Largo is a much needed haven and an upscale alternative to the sometimes scruffy Keys experience. This is one secret you won’t want to keep to yourself. Learn more www.playalargoresort.com.Keys8

Expert Tip

Take the road less traveled by driving Card Sound instead of US 1. There are only two ways to get in and out of the Keys, the traffic can be brutal especially on holiday weekends.

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, travel blogger and speaker and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.crossnm.com



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